So we rely on him as a bit of a wetware-based GPS system.  Let him look at the map of a new place, and then let him tell you where to turn and how to get places.  And although he might very occasionally make a mistake, he’s way better than I am.  Every once in a while I think "no, that’s wrong, I think we need to go this way instead"; but 80-90% of the time he’s the one who’s right. So, on our recent vacation to Acadia National Park in Maine, he was totally useful.  "How do we get to X, Oz?"  "Where do I need to turn for Y?"  I don’t even bother with the map.

And then, on the way home, he went Hal on us.  We asked him to direct us home by a particular route.  But after a while, we realized he was taking us another way.  We said "No Oz, we want to go by route X".  He replied "I’m sorry Dad, but I’m afraid I can’t do that."  OK, not those exact words.  But still.

By that time, we were far enough along his route that it would have been a big hassle to backtrack.  So we let the autopilot continue.  Result:  10 miles shaved off the return route.

I swear he was humming "Bicycle built for two" under his breath.

So I was a bit bugged when NYS Attorney General Andrew “pre-whore Spitzer” Cuomo made threats about shutting down the newsgroups by threatening to prosecute ISPs on child porn charges for the illegal stuff — which in my view is like threatening to shut down the phone company because people sometimes use the phone to set up drug deals. But hey, you can kill anything if you paint it as a threat to children, or a help to pedophiles. Sure enough, the major ISPs — including Time-Warner’s Road Runner, mine — just bailed, shutting down their usenet news servers as of today. So no usenet for me — and, presumably, none for those using it for evil.

Oh, except that I (and those using it for evil) can buy usenet newsgroup access for about $5/month from a third party provider, and get and post exactly the same things as before.

I know as a parent that I feel like my son is so much safer from the pedophiles now; don’t you?

Update: Interestingly, Time-Warner is lying about why they did this; here’s the bit from their FAQ, that says it’s because of “low subscriber usage”:

I’d say “R.I.P.”, but George and I both know that’s the only option.

Here’s his wonderful “Religion is bullshit” bit:

And while I’m at it, the classic “Seven Words”:

Power chords. Distortion.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Now, just how ugly is it going to get?

UPDATE: And here’s his speech. Not bad at all.

Read the transcript here.

So did it move, or didn’t it? It’s like, a philosophical question, or something.

He actually liked MoMA the best, interestingly. As I’ve noted (see High Cultcha), we went through a little period of being interested in artists and their works, and so (given the slightly prodigious memory) his recollection and recognition of art works and artist from the modern period is probably at least as good as mine. (For example: He’s probably slightly better than I am at judging who the artist is when presented with a previously-unseen-by-him work by an artist he knows.)

But the most bizarre part of the trip for me was going to see the Statue of Liberty (which I had never done before). Not interesting so much because of the statue, but because of the crazy amount of security screening we needed to go through. So, after a very long wait in a very long line waiting to get on the Liberty Island ferry, we went through airplane-level security — pockets emptied, bags searched, belts, off, and the whole thing. Seemed a bit excessive, but I guess we’re all just were a little numb from doing it for air travel these days. So, onto the ferry, over to Liberty Island.

We have passes to get into the pedestal (no tourists up into the actual statue body any more), and sure enough, another long line, ending in another airport-level security check, but notched up a bit more — the walk-through scanners have the air blasts that blow all over your clothes to expose hidden things, you can’t bring any drinks along (even bottled water), and at this stage, my over-the shoulder sling pack is deemed too big, and so I’m sent to the lockers to stow it before we get in.

When I get to the lockers, it’s not some old-fashioned key or combination lock thing, but the new high-tech gadget where you go to a screen and have them scan your fingerprint for ID to get your stuff out of the locker when you leave. No kidding. So I’m totally not happy with this. I have, to the best of my knowledge, managed to keep my fingerprints “out of the system” for this long — no arrests or high-security jobs that would require fingerprinting — and although I’m not actually entering my name along with it, I’m still pretty displeased with this. So, I intentionally smudge and change fingers in the middle of the process, and sure enough, after two full misfires, I’m given the option to manually enter a PIN code instead of using the biometrics.* I happily do this, and we’re finally on our way in, only, oh, two hours delayed by the whole thing.

I feel so much safer now.

* If you are an agent of the Department of Homeland Security, let me say: “I am just kidding about this. I would never do anything to in any way circumvent or undermine the systems that have put in place to protect our nation and its landmarks against terrorist activities.”

In the cartoon on the box, George is definitely drunk.

I don’t think you can do that anymore.

Put it on the box, I mean.